Barry Steger

It’s mid-August and we have been on the road quite a bit lately. A realization I came to as we traveled country roads and busy highways is that I am a “back roads” type of person. I prefer to take the slow scenic route rather than the hectic highways.

At my age (in my 70’s), with cars rushing past me, switching from lane to lane, with some going 30 miles over the speed limit – I have come to the conclusion life really is passing me by and that is ok. In the 1970’s I drove 3 

new Firebirds and I was the one speeding past everyone else. It is a symbolic illustration that everything is going so fast. 

I have lived at a hectic pace for most of my life. Driven by the goal of getting it done, NOW! If I was not performing, I was not accomplishing. I needed to make my mark, have grandiose goals and I was a failure if I wasn’t successful in reaching all of them. Certainly God expected this of me, didn’t He? 

He did not, but I felt good about myself living at this pace. It gave me value and the praise of others. But, is it really ok to live life at a slower pace? Yes, it is if God has first place in my heart and my life. The Psalmist urges us to “Be still and know that I am God.” (Psalm 46:10) Are we taking time to do that?

Recently in Dallas, it took me 90 minutes just to get through town. Semi-trucks crowding me, at times, lanes lined with barriers on both sides, faint lane markers where it was difficult to determine where your lane actually was. I could have used counseling following that experience! 😜 It was not enjoyable. Where are my back roads?

The beauty of our travel over the past few months is that we got to see all 6 grandkids and their parents. We flew into Raleigh, NC to hang out with the Carolina Stegers for a long weekend. Minor league baseball games with Scott and Theo, Community Theatre where our granddaughter, Penny, performed, and time with Christina was simply the best.

On Monday, following the weekend, with the Carolina Stegers, Jeannie and I hit the road for a scenic vacay. We took the back roads as we drove south and it was wonderful. We left Mebane, NC and drove down to Pinehurst, N.C. – your quintessential southern town, lined with 10 beautiful golf courses. I even got a picture of the iconic Payne Stewart statue in the back of the clubhouse.

Lots of trees and open fields. Little traffic, with signs in the yards that read, Eggs for Sale – honor system, Red Blood Worms sold here. I could not wait to find the sign that said “Fresh Peaches and Boiled Peanuts ahead, 2 miles.” We were on the back roads, and it just seemed perfect. From Pinehurst we were on the way to the little town of Calabash, NC, famous for their fried seafood, and their quaint fishing village. It did not disappoint. On the drive to Calabash were street signs that read, Swamp Hollow Road and Dixie Delight Lane. And, yes, I found my peaches!

Following a Calabash lunch we passed through Myrtle Beach, where Jeannie and I met in 1973. She worked at the 20th Century Kitchen, as a waitress and I was a lifeguard at the Swamp Fox Hotel. Yep, some 52 years ago. I was a student at Ole Miss, Jeannie a student at La. Tech.

Not far from Myrtle, just down Highway 17, is Litchfield Beach. We stayed at the Litchfield Inn, where my parents had stayed in 1964. Still a “classy” little resort, ocean front property. Families, dogs running the beach, bicycles everywhere.  The room, beach and the view were post card perfection. Knowing my parents stayed there 61 years prior made it more special.

Following Litchfield, we had reservations for lunch at Poogan’s Porch, an old antebellum home, where Poogan, their dog, greeted folks on the front porch in downtown Charleston for years before it became a local restaurant. A plate of Fried Green Tomatoes and Shrimp and Grits made us both look for a roadside park for a nap in the car. Well that did not happen. However, with Charleston in our rear view mirror, we were lumbering down Highway 17, hugging the coast line with great anticipation of Savannah, GA and the Wilkes House. The Wilkes House was on Jones Street, known as the prettiest street in Savannah. Rumor has it that the term, “Keeping up with the Jones’s” was from living on this street. This place was special. We pulled our suitcases up a huge flight of stairs. When the house was built in 1870 all living quarters began on the second floor because of the dust from the horses and carriages on street level.

The Wilkes House has the reputation of the best place in Savannah for lunch. We were housed right above Mrs. Wilkes Dining Room and started smelling the Fried Chicken about 8 am. Around 10 am, 5 days a week, a line forms of people hoping to be a part of the first seating, 50 to a 100 people line up. It’s all family style, you sit around the table with people you do not know. Then you start passing 26 bowls of vegetables, 4 meats including fried chicken, chicken and dumplings and of course sweet tea was on the menu.. The gravy, the cornbread were unmatched. I am getting hungry just talking about it. Because we were guests, we entered through the back door and the kitchen. My goodness, it was sooooo good. 

One afternoon, we took the back roads over to Hilton Head, SC, we had lunch next to the Lighthouse that overlooked the harbor. We could have stayed there all day, sitting in the rocking chairs and enjoying watching people. The place was designed for stillness. The Mahi Mahi, the scallops, oysters, shrimp hit the spot. 

Back to Savannah, a tour of Savannah on the Trolly, that was so hot, that would lead us to Leopold’s Ice Cream, where the line literally stretched down the street. It was worth the wait.

I know this blog feels a lot like “On the Road with Charles Kuralt” if you are old enough to remember him.😉

Hopefully, there is a purpose in this back roads blog. There are times, I look like I have slowed down, however internally I can still find myself churning, and stressing over feeling the need to just keep doing more. I too have created habits that are hard to stop. Our culture applauds these actions, however, I want to slow down enough to see people that need to be seen. I want to have the eyes that see into the hearts and needs of others. I want to have words that bring life to people, like Jesus does, I want a heart to give sacrificially and look past my own wants and desires. We want to live out the mission of Legacy Landing, and we are, and many of you are helping to make it a reality, thank you!

Maybe, taking the back roads is a start of something new. 

Now…off to Weight Watchers! (too much Southern cooking!)

Barry and Jeannie

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May 29th, Jeannie and I celebrated 49 years of marriage. You might compare our marriage to an old cutting board in our home that my granddad made for my parents. It  has the letter S engraved in each of the four corners and one big S in the middle.  I love to bring it out, it’s nostalgic for me.  (Now passed on down to us and hopefully passed on to one of our Steger men one day.)  From a distance it looks great – thick wood, beautiful glossy finish. But to look closer, it has some deep cuts in the wood. It has taken some gashes, yet survived, and it still serves its purpose after all these years.  No marriage is easy; ours has survived some deep gashes. Neither of us grew up in a Christian home, but I am confident God had a plan with the parents He chose for us. In many ways it has helped to shape us in our approach to marriage and parenting.

I remember when we were considering getting married the question came up, “Will you  be stronger in impacting the world as a  Christian couple, or is it better to remain single?”  I’m so thankful, not only did Jeannie say yes to the dress, but yes to my proposal. 

Now in this chapter of our lives, for the first time, we are going to more funerals than weddings. We are attending fewer graduation parties from high school or college and more “graduation to heaven” or “celebration of life” parties as many of our friends have passed. We wonder where did these 49 years go, how quickly did we get to this point? Even my 50th high school reunion was 5 years ago – how can that be? We have kids in their 40’s (not you, Elizabeth ), our grandkids range in age from 4-16. I am thankful that words like grace and forgiveness are words that Jeannie and I use a lot more often  than we did in the early days of our marriage. 

Do you ever try to fine-tune something?  You can fine tune your guitar, you can fine tune your golf swing, you can fine tune a speech. Forty nine years of marriage have allowed us to consider what we want to”FINE TUNE” in our lives. We have recently had this discussion. I asked the question, “What can we fine tune now so that we might honor God in how we serve Him for the rest of this journey?”

You know of our calling to a ministry of hospitality. Christ served as our example in this ministry. He came to serve, not to be served. (Matthew 20:28) He asked us to invite Him in that He might “sup” (dine) with us. (Rev. 3:20) He washed HIs disciples’ feet. (John 13:5)

• Romans 12:13: “Contribute to the needs of the saints and practice hospitality.”
• Hebrews 13:2: “Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers…”
• 1 Peter 4:9: “Show hospitality to one another without grumbling.” 

We realize that this home of ours belongs to Him, and is available to be used by Him to minister to others.  Few women would say in response to a phone call, “Come over, spend the night, we are here for you.” like Jeannie does. (“Come upstairs, we have a bed to make.” – her words to me. )

Additionally, we desire to encourage others. I love the example of Barnabas in the early church. His name means “son of encouragement.” He was known for extending generosity and encouragement to others. 

Jeannie and I feel blessed to serve with our “little” ministry, Legacy Landing. It is not a ministry to thousands like we have been a part of in the past. It is a phone call, a visit, a note, a prayer, a retreat. It is hospitality, kindness, serving, encouragement. It is what we are still “fine tuning.” It is what we enjoy doing together as a couple. To those who continue to invest in us and our ministry, “Thank you!” For those who pray for us, “Thank you!” We are so grateful for you! We love you! I guess we really are like that old cutting board: we have a few gashes, but we still have a purpose and for that we are so thankful!

We may be broken pieces of clay that should have been swept into the dumpster. But He has no broom. He repairs us. He puts us back together.  He sees us as His treasure. We are His fine china, even when I feel like I am a paper plate. He is the one who says performance is not a prerequisite for acceptance. “You do not have to please others or check all the boxes to be loved by Me.” How amazing is that? Broken, yet whole; sinful, yet forgiven; insecure, yet secured by His amazing Grace! We are forever grateful!”

49 years ago, Christmas Day 1975, Jeannie said “yes” as I proposed. That week we were serving at a Campus Crusade Christmas Conference for college students. At our hotel, we met a young married couple. They were in New Orleans to attend the Sugar Bowl and cheer on their Penn State Nitany Lions. I snagged some tickets to the game, surprise right? We went to the game with this couple and following the game we had the opportunity to share our faith with them. They both prayed to receive Christ. It was a wonderful way to start our engagement and ministry together.

We have served with each other in some capacity all these years. Now, with Jeannie’s retirement, we can again serve together in ministry with Legacy Landing. I am so excited to officially welcome Jeannie to our ministry to those that have been wounded, in life or ministry.

Would you celebrate with us with a year-end gift to Legacy Landing, which is our salary and helps us serve others? For those that have already given, thank you!

Please use the link below and please pray.

We love you,

Barry and Jeannie

https://legacylanding.org/give/

In 49 years of ministry, Jeannie and I have experienced many opportunities to present the gospel to others, to serve others. We have presented the gospel one on one to many, been on stages in front of 100’s of people with the same message.

I have led CRU summer projects, where we shared Christ with 20,000 people each summer.  I have been a campus director at University of North Texas and built relationships with some of the best kids ever, many who remain my friends today. I have hosted retreats for people in ministry who are tired and wounded. I have led high school ministries and seen many come to know Christ.

I have spoken at Fraternity and Sorority houses to tell college kids about Christ. I have been a chaplain of a college football team. I have shared Christ with professors at Ivy league schools, like Dartmouth, and other schools like MIT and U Mass.

I have worked 100-hour weeks to put on events, have gone to bed at midnight, and gone back to the office at 2 am to complete a task to hopefully encourage others. There were nights when I left the Empire State Building at midnight, caught the train to Harlem, where I was staying, only to be back on the train at 6:30 am to help grow a Christian college.

I have sat on the dock on the Kenai River, after days of cutting grass, weed eating, buying flowers, creating a setting for those that have experienced devastating loss to find a healing place at a Spark of Life retreat. I have sat across the table from a mom, whose children were murdered; to hear her story, her pain, and to tell her I love her.

To help fund ongoing ministries, I have worked on golf tournament fundraisers, where I spent 7 months out of the year preparing for a one-day event. I have led an army of volunteers who taught Home Builder Bible studies across the country.

Jeannie and I led a Family Life marriage conference to CRU staff in Poland. I have spoken in public classrooms in Russia and presented the gospel to teenage kids to see many respond and accept Christ. I have walked the dusty streets of Mexico and shown the Jesus film, as families rode donkeys to view the outdoor presentation and lined up in front of me to have me share Christ in the broken Spanish I learned in high school.

Honestly, this list can go on and on.

Two thoughts – none of this compares to what Christ did for us on the cross; His sacrifice, His love is unmatched in every way.

The second thing is the word “I”, referenced above, should be replaced with “WE.” So many of you have prayed for us and sacrificially given so “WE” could have a ministry together. The above is your work, your investments, your sacrifices.

Jeannie and I trust we have been good stewards of your gifts. We have been in this together. WE have partnered with Him to GO preach the gospel. Jeannie and I might have been the arms and feet, but you made it happen. Jeannie and I could not have gone without you. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.

We are not quitting. In fact, we hope we are now operating out of our best place ever to do His will. Like seasoning to a good meal, we are seasoned. As we lead Legacy Landing we are in our sweet spot as a couple.

God has called Jeannie and me to a ministry of hospitality. Jesus welcomed everyone to His table. The verse below inspires us. I guess it could be said, it is what we bring to the table.

“Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing so, some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.” Hebrews 13:2

The English word hospitality originates from the same Latin root as the word hospital. A hospital is literally a ‘home for strangers.’ Of course, it has come to mean a place of healing. There is a link between being welcomed and being healed.

Skye Jethani wrote, “Our homes are to be hospitals—refuges of healing radiating the light of heaven. And our dinner tables are to be operating tables—the place where broken souls are made whole again….When we lower our defenses, when we remove our façades and we begin to be truly present with one another—then the healing power of the gospel can begin its work.”

“Hospitality may be the church’s best weapon in the middle of the current culture war.” (Jon Tyson)

We are thankful for the opportunities you have given us as we continue to be His ambassadors.

Barry and Jeannie

The words that seem to be crossing my personal radar screen lately are Compassion Fatigue.  I hear them talked about in a Podcast, I see them in a book I am reading, those words seem to be everywhere. 

Years ago, when I was at FamilyLife, I worked with the most precious lady. Her name was Cliffe, she was my administrative assistant, she was a saint. One day she wrote a note and taped to my desk.  This is what it said, “Dear Barry, it is not your responsibility to take care of the whole world. That is my job!” –  GOD

Pastors, caregivers, health care professionals, business leaders today have a whole new set of battles as they juggle and struggle with the needs, not only in their personal lives and families, but as they manage the needs of their teams and co-workers. A new 5 letter word, COVID, has wreaked havoc in many of our lives.

Many years ago on the Ed Sullivan show, there was an entertainer who would spin multiple plates on top of long poles. He would start with one plate, then move on to the next and the next and the next, until there were many plates all spinning at the same time. As the plates began to wobble, he would dash back to the beginning and re-spin each plate just as they were about to crash to the floor. Is that not like us today, so many plates spinning, so much going on, then we wobble, hoping that someone or something will keep us from crashing to the floor.

A few years back, I had the joy of working with Spark of Life. This ministry came alongside people who had experienced devastating loss. We would call these people “our heroes.” It took so much courage for them to reach out for help. I worked with that ministry for 6 years, and it definitely took a toll on me.

It seemed that my every conversation was about loss. Every time I approached a donor, I was telling a loss story. I loved the hurting people who attended our grief recovery retreats. I wanted to help carry their burdens. Our Spark team gave all they had to come alongside these people.

When I left Spark of Life, I realized I had nothing left emotionally. In the past few years, I have lost several dear friends, I mean best friends. They were each in a battle with serious health issues, and I realized I had nothing to give them. It broke my heart that I had nothing. In the past, I would have been on the frontlines with them, reaching out to them. But instead, I wanted to retreat because I was emotionally exhausted. I was burned out, weary… I had compassion fatigue.  

I should have paid more attention to the note Cliffe left on my desk. It is not my responsibility to save the world. That is God’s job.

Over the past two years I have been on my own journey of recovery from burnout. I have endeavored to spend more time alone with God. To be still and listen. To meditate on these words from Jesus,

“Come to Me all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30

Have you noticed that Jesus was never in a hurry? He set an example by getting away often from the crowd, from the demands and the needs of others so He could have time to pray to His Father. He saw this as a priority. Our Lord retreated, rested, and prayed often. Should we not do the same?

This is why Legacy Landing is being formed, this is His ministry. The need has already been expressed by so many. It is ok to have a little Soul Care. We trust that our Legacy Landing retreats will be a gentle reminder that God has the world, He has you and He wants to spend time with you away from the noisy places in your life.

Jeannie and I recently spent some time at one of our retreat locations. It is a beach house on a small island in south Florida. You have to take a ferry boat to get to the property. It is a place I think Jesus would have gone to retreat, but he would not have needed a ferry boat. 

We still need God to provide the ongoing funds to support Legacy Landing. If you are in a position togive, will you please pray about helping to support this ministry? And if you’ve already given, thank you so, so much! Please pray for us as we continue to finetune the retreat material and as we continue to raise additional support to meet our salary and ministry expenses.

Many of you have walked this journey of faith with us for 45 years, many of you are just joining us. We are so thankful for each one of you!!

Right before Covid hit some dear friends asked, if they purchased a place in Florida, would we want to use it for a ministry we have been dreaming about? Of course, we said yes! May I introduce you to the property that God, the Lord Jesus, has provided. It is perfect for this ministry, It is Come Aside, Rest, Be Still, Listen.

“Behold, I will do something new, Now it will spring forth.”

Please continue to pray for the funding for this ministry. Please pray, please Give by clicking on this link. www.legacylanding.org

The name Legacy Landing comes from our friends having a place to serve their family and friends with a beautiful property, making memories, thus legacy, and our heart to have a Landing spot for those weary, battle worn and need for rest, thus, landing. We consider it a wonderful partnership.

We love each of you, thankful for our dear friends, and for a God who has shown His kindness!